Stop us if you’ve heard this one before. No, don’t. We’re gonna tell it anyway, cos that’s the Dad joke way we roll… 
 
STALLONE: I’m making a movie about composers. I’m playing Beethoven.
VAN DAMME: I’ll be Mozart.
SCHWARZENEGGER: Stop it guys. I’m not saying it.

March was a busy old month, which is how we like it, the halls all alive with the sound of music: musicians rehearsing, producers producing, writers having quiet Eureka moments over coffee. We got a sneak preview (or barged in, depending on how you look at it) of the songs resident producer Hannah V has been working on with Jo Harrop – a lush, luxurious mix of smoky jazz and blues. To know that similar collaborations are going on in all the producers’ studios, in all genres – fills us with great joy. If you rehearse here or have a resident studio, don’t be shy! Pop into the office and tell us what you’re up to, world domination-wise. We’re on your side.

ART OF ARRANGING PARTICIPANTS SMASHED IT!
Last month saw our second year of running Janette Mason’s sold out Art of Arranging Course, where participants learned how to arrange their own compositions for a master recording. Harder than you might think, but very rewarding when you hear your song come to life in the recording studio. What a privilege it was to see songs in a fairly basic format blossom into absolutely beautiful, fully produced tracks under the gently encouraging tuition from Janette, and vocal coach Kimberly Roberts, who at various points, had the group making bubbling sounds with their lips, crying like babies, and just belting or going all sotto voce in all the right places. Along with a stellar band – Janette on piano, Tom Mason on bass and Simon Lea on drums – there was course participant Mark Choueke on acoustic guitar, lending a hand to the other songwriters, and Graham Plummer who added some great solos. And what a variety of genres we had, from rollicking country, smooth jazzy lounge vibes, heartfelt singer-songwriter acoustic strumming, straight up soul and a gorgeous big ballad show tune. Mark Choueke, who recorded his lush tune called Seaside Girl said, “It’s been a blast, watching people’s talents shine out like that.” And Sofia said, “The course is just fantastic. It was so great to see everyone’s songs develop and to witness the band in that environment at that level of musicianship is a real rarity. It just fills my veins with excitement to just see how they are capable of creating any kind of vision or sound.”
Stay tuned – we’re planning to run this course twice a year now!

JAZZ PIANO PERFORMANCE COURSE
Hurry, hurry, hurry. Only two places left if you want to take part in Nikki Yeoh’s live piano performance course running over May 5^th, 6^th and 7^th. The tutors are Nikki, Tim Richards and John Crawford. Learn all about comping with a band, culminating in a live set playing with an ace band with Binker Golding on sax, Dominic Howles on bass and Mark Mondesir on drums. That last day gig is also a party, so you can invite your friends and family and show them how great you can play! Cost is £275 all inclusive.

For more info head here or email: michele@premiseseducation.org

BV COURSE WITH LURINE
Advance notice! We’ve been very lucky to get Lurine Cato MBE, lead and backing vocalist supreme, back for another backing vocals course on July 20^th, 21^st and 22^nd.  She ran one here in February and got some very special guests in, including Zalon (who did BV’s for Amy Winehouse and has his own thriving music career) to give participants some extra help and insider knowledge of the industry and how to get the best pro gigs. Getting a BV gig over others is all about learning the songs inside out, even hours before, and showing up with the moves as well as the pipes. Lurine is that perfect combination of friendly and encouraging, and no-nonsense, don’t mess with me. She not only has the techniques to share, but a wealth of experience to give you a head start in the BV world. Get in early, as the last course sold out very quickly.
For more info: michele@premiseseducation.org

AN OCCASIONAL SERIES OF CONVERSATIONAL AMBUSHES
We sit down in the caff for a quick brew and natter with Asian Dub Foundation’s percussive beatboxing flautist Nathan Flutebox Lee, and ADF’s longest serving member, guitarist Steve Chandra Savale, who, in a former incarnation, would tune all his strings to one note and play them with a knife.
Nathan is polishing off a Premises’ Full English, and tells me he started playing with his mates The Prodigy before joining ADF, a glorious mish mash of rap, punk, ragga, dancehall, acid house and most recently, drill elements. Though interested in Asian music patterns, Steve in particular is quick to reject what he calls “the hippy part” which I take to mean the cod spirituality of the Buddha of Suburbia variety.
They are more into the radical side of things, including The Black Panthers, the radical Indian Naxalite Maoist revolutionaries, and less keen on Ghandi. “Depart as friends?” says Steve, a look of disdain crossing his brow, “Not that bit. It’s nonsense.”
Right now, they’re more into collaborating with drill artist Chenks. Nathan says, “We’re not into the gangster element, but we are brown boys from London and the landscape around drill is ours, too. I understand the anger but I like the music, the beats.”
At this point the conversation picks up speed, not unlike the pace of drill, which leads to my mishearing Steve’s mention of a collaboration with Radiohead’s Ed O’ Brien as Edna O’ Brien, the Irish literary giant. But the mistake spurs Nathan on to riff on other possible absurd writer collaborations. “Oh yeah, we’re gonna work with Jeffry Archer, Salman Rushdie, who else….”
Nathan goes on to talk about the internet brouhaha that followed the release of their 2020 number one single ‘Comin’ Over Here’ an hilarious anti-Brexit, anti-racist collaboration with comedian Stewart Lee. “What was surprising was that the anti-racists were as angry as the racists, I mean, vicious.”
With a ‘What can ya do?’ congenial shrug, Nathan is off to join Steve in studio 8 for rehearsal. They’re working on a new album and preparing for a European tour in May. They are fast, funny, furious and exploding with new ideas all the time. For tour dates and more info on all things ADF head here.

WHO’S BEEN IN?
Amongst others in March… Tomorrow’s Warriors, Liberty Church, Carcass, Olivia Dean, TIEKS, Trinity Laban, Asha Parkinson, The Dream Syndicate, Maya Delilah, The Trouble Makers, Kamal, Yazmin Lacey, Omar Puente, Matilda Mann, Triggerfish,  Johnny Hates Jazz, Biig Piig, Sid James Experience, Jamie Vinall, Heidrunna, Lava La Rue, Irene Taylor Trust, Attawalpa, The CLOCK programme, Jealous Nostril, Bedhead, Glory Choir, Patchwork, Sam Benson, Elephant Kind, Asian Dub Foundation, Marc Almond, Soweto Kinch and the LSO, The Moonlighters, The Waeve, Clive Brown, John Pepito, Slow Thai, Alice in Wonderland, Lola Young, Logan J Parker, Sam Mumford, Lucy McWilliams, Elkka, Ricco, Eve Fisher, Cian Ducrot, Hannah Brine, Kid Apollo, Albion Band, Tom Ball,  Midas Jams, Amahla, Cian Downing, Goldfrapp, Rum Buffalo, Jeff Francis, Declan Donovan, Guy McCready and his Third Ear, Tenacity and The Swingle Singers.

HAPPY EASTER ALL. WE’RE OPEN EVERY DAY, SO WHEN YOU GET THE ITCH TO PLAY, YOU KNOW WHERE TO COME! 

AND FINALLY…

QUOTE OF THE MONTH
“There’s nothing that makes you so aware of the improvisation of human existence as a song unfinished. Or an old address book.” Carson McCullers

RHYTHM SECTION MASTERCLASS
On February 11^th, we’re thrilled to be hosting an intensive one-day Masterclass by bass player extraordinaire Yolanda Charles MBE. The full day session will be focussed on musical development for bassists and drummers. Yolanda, who has played for and/or toured with Robbie Williams, Paul Weller, Squeeze and Hans Zimmer amongst others, will help you develop a nuanced approach to style, influence, feel and groove. Not suitable for beginners, but aimed at drummers and bass players at intermediate level and above, who have some experience playing within a band or group setting. If you are in a band and want to come as a pair (bass and drums), that’d be even better! But move fast, as we go to press there are only five places left. Early Bird price of £75.  More information here.

WHO’S BEEN IN?

December was busy with visits from, amongst others…   

Dirty Rumour, Liberty Church, Grand Union Orchestra, Hannah Brine, Trinity Laban, Tommy LaFoy, Music For Youth, Slow Thai, Shiva Nova, Quaye, Ben Marc, Art Terry, Nokomis, Yazz Ahmed, Flower Of Love, Young Gun Silver Fox, Ezra Collective, Bryn Christopher, Joy Anonymous, Horrifix, Ash, Anoushka Shankar, Snowman and Snowdog Orchestra, Superfly, Sarah Tandy, James Ford, Omar, Caity Baiser, United Freedom Collective, Black Country New Road, China Moses, Miss Baby Sol, Nathan Ware, Robert Fleming, Tsunainia, Loyle Carner, Joss Stone, Moving Mirrors, Engines Orchestra, Self Esteem, Elephant Kind, Tom Burke and Daisy Loving

GET THAT SONG DOWN!
Got a song in your head and run out of paper napkins and bits of paper to write it down on, or do you sing it on some not very good phone recorder thing? We feel your pain and here’s the solution: recently we’ve been testing out a new iPhone recording app called Tape It, invented by an old friend of the Premises, Thomas Walther, and the audio quality is vastly superior to Apple’s Voice Memos. The perfect tool for songwriters and musicians wanting to quickly record ideas and demos. Super easy to use and exporting recordings is a doddle. Great for recording interviews too. Get the app FREE here: https://tape.it/ or search for Tape It in the App Store.

AND FINALLY…

“I’ll never make it. It will never happen because they’re never going to hear me ‘cause they’re screaming all the time.”Elvis Presley

Your newsletter correspondent knows the feeling. People do scream when she sings, but perhaps not for quite the same reasons as those who screamed and fainted for The King. There’s a reason those of us behind the scenes in the music business, are behind the scenes.

MERCURY PRIZE WINNERS
Say what you like about The Premises (and we hope you will say that you like us very much) but rather a lot of the nominees have graced us with their presence, dear. Every year, we’re always excited to see at least half of our clients in the shortlist and this year was no exception: Self Esteem, Sam Fender, Joy Crookes, Yard Act, Kojey Radical and of course, the glorious Wet Leg. But we did let out a particularly big yelp of delight when our gal Little Simz scooped the big prize, and she was a model of grace, gratitude and humbleness. Check out her distinct and smooth flow, not to mention innovative hair architecture, on the brilliant ‘Sometimes I Might Be Introvert’. Huge congrats to all!

OCTOBER VOICE JAMS
We had a lively, lovely bunch of young singers in to work with vocal coach extraordinaire Clive Brown over the half term. Some were from Hackney schools, one from the Brit School and one determined youngster travelling all the way in from Essex. It was pleasure and a privilege to watch the singers go from shy and reticent and singing quite low in the first few hours, to hitting their stride with three-part harmonies, rapping and all sorts of playful nuances by the end of the first day. They worked on Lean on Me, and Stand Up.  Clive brings out the showbiz confidence, clarity, diction and good manners (these things count) in everyone.  The transformation within the group over the week, was palpable, and the energy in the recording session, pure magic. Watch this space for news of future Voice Jams in coming half terms.

WHO’S BEEN IN?
A mega line-up last month, including (deep breath)… Alexander Joseph, Biig Piig, Cian Downing, Beck Hill, Boy Bleach, Maya Delilah, Beth Orton, Loyle Carner, House Gospel Choir, Dan D’Lion, Steve Weston, Omar Puente, Nicky Rubin, Anoushka Shankar (below), Trigger Fish, Robert Mitchell, The Weilthings, Brass Funkeys, Kyla La Grange, Liberty Church, Trinity Laban, Syleena Johnsson, Paddy Murphy, Metamorphics, Miriam Jackson, Midtown Funk, Murkage Dave, Glory Boy, Oxlade, Nicky Rubin, Duke St Big Band, Donna Thompson, The Squires, Malika, Tellison, Eliane Correa, Mark Almond, Tenacity, Jealous Nostril, Celeste, Rachel Chinouriri, Glory Choir, Nick Woodmansey, Nadine Khouri, Eliza Doolittle, Rio Hellyer, Black Country New Road, Ashton Jones, Joshua Jaswon, Ewan Mainwood, Tomorrow’s Warriors, Jay Wilcox, Bby Ivy, Zara McFarlane, Dylan, Clive Brown, Moonshine Heavies, Attawalpa, Adrian Sykes, Adam Rowley, Future Sounds, Carina Tamer, Elliot Doyle, Creative Artists Network, Led Bib, Aura, Izzy Bizu, Prep, Iraina, The Mekons, Black Midi, Asha Parkinson, Lava La Rue, Lucy McWilliams, Jaz Karis, Joe Stilgoe and Girls of The Internet.

RECORDING STUDIO A
The Beeb has been putting quite a bit of comedy our way recently, the latest being a late-night radio 4 programme written by comedian Kat Sadler, whose show Kat Sadler’s Screen Time goes out on the 17^th and 24^th of November on Radio 4 at 11pm. The clue as to what the show is about is in the title, which speaks volumes for how young people today live their lives through social media and their phones in particular. Kat finds a girlfriend on her phone, a seemingly perfect relationship, but the course of social media love does not run smoothly. Sounds like a hoot, and a very topical one at that.

PREMISES RADIO – TRACKS OF THE MONTH

PREMISES PEOPLE
It’s a truth universally acknowledged that those who rehearse/teach/record at The Premises who are not already superstars, will have superstardom thrust upon them, at least to our ears and often to the wider world.
Our Piano Week regular tutor, the mega-talented Robert Mitchell has a double LP out with his band True Think, an innovative project entitled: Hold The Light- The New Resistance. To find out more: https://robertmitchell.bandcamp.com/
Long time jazz, funk and soul maestros Cymande are having their debut album re-released by Partisan in rather fabulous Orange Crush vinyl. Plus, they are the stars of the award winning documentary “Getting It Back”. More Cymande info here: http://cymandeofficial.com
Celebrating 40 years of making wild, wonderful, fusion music taking in too many global traditions to mention, the mighty Grand Union Orchestra will be playing Shoreditch Town Hall on 3rd and 4^th  December at Shoreditch Town Hall, just a hop, skip and jump from The Premises. For more info: www.grandunion.org.uk 
Young jazz wizard composer and multi instrumentalist Roella Oloro is over from her final year studies at Berklee for the London Jazz Festival this month, with dates at The Living Room, Pizza Express, Ronnie Scott’s (already SOLD OUT) and The Royal Albert Hall. For more details: https://www.instagram.com/roellaoloromusic/?hl=en

AND FINALLY…
We are currently VERY heavily booked. So please.. if your rehearsal dates are important, get them in the book well in advance. CALL 0207 729 7593. We’re always here, from early to late, 7 days a week. We hate having to turn any of our regulars away.

“Someone just got me a shower radio. I guess there’s no better place to dance than a slick surface next to a glass door.” Jerry Seinfeld

As a lifelong bathtub and shower singer, I can relate to some extent, but it’s been pointed out to me that my not so mellifluous tones can shatter glass at 40 paces, so these days I confine my watery warbling to some song you’re meant to sing two verses of while you wash your hands to de-germ them.  Now Happy Birthday is standard but boring, as is the ABC alphabet song, though I tend to forget the lyrics after H or so…of course, there’s been a survey about this sorta thing. What’s your go-to hand washing song, now the season of lurgies is just around the corner? Best answer wins a bar environmentally friendly soap.

STAYING GREEN IN THE ENERGY CRISIS
Our energy costs last year were over £36k so we’re looking at ways to survive the coming winter whilst also making The Premises an even Greener place to create music. There’s our pioneering solar powered recording Studio A of course and now we’re looking to invest in a second PV system to power the rest of the building.
What can musicians do? Maybe take a look at the Music Declares Emergency and Julie’s Bicycle websites, which are chock full of ideas to make your musical enterprise more ecologically sustainable.

APPEAL OF THE MONTH

Delighted to hear that Premises’ regular Roella Oloro, with her jazz collective The Diasporan Queens picked up two prizes from the Seven Virtual Jazz Competition – including Roella’s arrangement of Patrice Rushen’s L’espirit  De Joie, and the Innovation Prize, which will culminate in a performance at the Milan Jazz Club Ferrera. Her year at Berklee has been jam packed, doing a full complement of courses, all night recording sessions, playing in her own bands and others as well as running and rehearsing her own 17-piece big band. Now Roella is seeking funds to complete her Senior Year at Berklee, to which she has a full scholarship but this doesn’t include room, board and medical expenses. We know it’s been a tough year financially for many of you, but if you can, please chip in to Roella’s final year fund.

WE HAVE A WINNER!

Last month we ran a competition to have one of your songs set to film in Studio One. The response was overwhelming and the quality of submissions, very high indeed. We know everyone says that but we really mean it. It was very difficult to choose the artist and song but we do have a winner, a relative newcomer, 18-year-old Gabriel Lord-Baptiste. His song I Am The Enemy fizzes with rapid fire lyrics expressing the struggles and big questions young people face, post Pandemic.
Gabriel is a singer, songwriter, rapper, musician and producer from North London.
He’s a member of Tomorrow’s Warriors and has recorded with Laura White, Vula, Mista Jam, and Cherise, as well as playing with Jazz Jamaica at the Jazz Café. “I love discovering different styles and genres of music from 80s synth to neo-soul to new hip hop beats,” he says. “During lockdown, I focused on producing my own material on Logic and have just finished producing my first EP, which will be released later this year.”
Film-maker Sheridan Serafin is going to shoot the video in Studio 1 here soon and we’ll bring you the result in the next newsletter.

WHO’S BEEN IN?

Among many others last month, we welcomed… Jocelyn Brown, Sona Blue, Death Valley Yacht Club, Jon Hopkins, Finn Lomax, Dexy’s Midnight Runners, Spencer Kelly, Fi McCluskey, Jazz Jamaica, Boy Bleach, Liberty Church, Tomorrow’s Warriors, Pain and Bad News, Tom Platts, Laura Mvula, Biig Piig, Jake Shears, Emeli Sande, Vula, Elephant Kind, Albion, Trigger Fish, Maverick Sabre, Dan D’Lion, The Staves, Scritti Politti, Manifest, Say She She, Celeste, Seaforth, Self-Esteem, Jarvis Cocker, Metamoprhic, Subjective ft Goldie, and Cleveland Watkiss, the Handsome Family, Joyce Sims, Ezra Collective as well as old friends Cymande (above, with Neville Malcolm 4^th from right, back on the mend after his recent bad accident.) And last but not least, Joanna Lumley recording in Studio A (“Dame… and don’t you forget it, sweeties!”)

PREMISES RADIO TOP FIVE
If you’ve not yet tuned into Premises Radio why the heck is that? If you’re reading this, you’re probably on it, plus you’ll be in some esteemed and eclectic company. We know bands don’t like being categorised by genre, and we think our playlists reflect that weird and wonderful mix that you might overhear when you stroll down our hallowed corridors of aural delights. Just like a REAL radio station on actual radio, or Wireless for those of you who speak in an affected manner, we have our Top Five Tracks of the Month. All as good as each other, so no ascending or descending order. Here they are:

1. Cleveland Watkiss. Red Gold and Green
2. Fontaines DC. Jackie Down The Line
3. Hannah V ft Shystie and Pepper Rose. No Limits
4. TIEKS. Sunshine
5. Tony Kofi. Ruby my Dear

AND FINALLY….